On Letting Go and Moving On
|June 2, 2012||Posted by the color scheme under Blogging, Creative Writing, Life, Love, Opinions, Personal, Random, Real Life, Relationships, Stories, Thoughts, Writing|
I think, one of the hardest and most crucial stage of getting off a broken relationship is moving on and leaving the past behind.
Some people get stuck at this stage and then realize they cannot let go of what they had in the past. Some even want to bring the past back. But we all know not all kinds of relationship is worth the risk of going back. Here are some insights about letting go and moving on.
During my high school days, I had a series of firsts. My first period, my first prom, my first 3D movie, my first sleep over, my first prom queen moment, my first science fair, my first test exemption and of course, my first heartbreak.
My first heartbreak was kind of funny and sad. Some might even say that it was pitiful and I was just making a complete fool out of myself. But that moment taught me a lot about life, love and friendship.
I had a crush on a classmate at the age of 13, like every normal girl have at this kind of age. We were friends but later on, I went too far out of our friendship. I cared for him more than a friend should and he became an important person in my life. To make the story short, since the thing I felt for him stretched until our senior year, he broke my heart in the end. As I’ve said, I went too far. That was because I had the wrong idea and interpretation of his actions.
Of course we were teased and at some point, I liked it. He and I texted a lot too. Sometimes, we both would fall asleep at 2 in the morning after texting. We call each other names that only the two of us know. We tell each other jokes. I even comforted him during the times that he wanted me to do so. He also said some things that made me think and hope that maybe a little, he felt the same for me. but unfortunately, I wasn’t that lucky.
It only occurred to me that I was nothing but a friend to him during our last months in high school. I remembered crying the whole night and blanking out on our chemistry test the day after. Even at school, I cried so hard. My friends didn’t know what happened to me. Only my bestfriends and close friends did. That day, I walked home with big fat tears streaming down my cheeks. I was sad for two whole days. I totally took it hard and he didn’t even know I was hurting.
Anyways, a good friend of mine told me that I should not let myself be weak. Instead, I should work hard and show him that I am strong and I can go on without him. Those were the words that really helped me get through that very awful mess.
Now, I am perfectly happy. I don’t even think about him that much anymore. If I do, it is only to recall the memories that I had and laugh at myself for being so corny and well, a bit stupid. We are still good friends, though. But he doesn’t include my future anymore. Too harsh? Well, to start off, I wasn’t a part of his past in the first place. So that makes us even. What I felt for him in the past was just one sided. And I realized that it wasn’t worth my precious tears and energy.
I told him what I felt for him then and made it clear to him that I’ve moved on. I told him I got over the days that I used to cry because of him a lot and I’m definitely not going back to those days. But I was all in all thankful though because I learned that we are better off as friends than something more. I learned that there are things that aren’t really meant to be and there’s nothing that you can do about it. I also learned that I was too young to be in a relationship and I still had to learn a lot of things. I also learned to treasure the people who loved me from the very beginning. I learned to treasure the people that were there for me all along. I also learned that there are more important things in this world than crying over a simple heartbreak. I learned that you can use the pain as stepping stone to become a stronger and better person.
When I think of it, those dark times were not bad at all. Sure it made me miserable. Sure it made me sad. Sure I had a few dark moments because of it. But somehow, it taught me a lesson. It made me realize that nothing lasts forever, even the pain and the tears. It all vanishes at one point. You just gotta hang in there.
The thing is, you can only learn how to start over once you learn to let go of the past.